Saturday, October 31, 2009

It's exciting when you're five!!

See that pumpkin? We don't have any of those this year. It's Halloween night here in NZ. The sky is dark, the moon is up, the witching hour has well and truly begun.

Our friends back in Canada have been gearing up for Halloween Parties rife with drunken debauchery. Their children have no doubt been outfitted with appropriate costumes (or inappropriate, it seems, if they are over the age of about 12), and have begun wandering the neighbourhoods, knocking on doors with bags that get larger by the year, collecting anything that people are willing to hand out (we had a can of tuna one year. Um, thanks?). Houses and yards will be decorated with the spookiest of ghoulies and ghosties. Things will jump up and shout "BOO!", people will scream and laugh, and fun will be had by all. Our old school is even having a Halloween dance.

What are we doing?

Sweet fuck all.

Welcome to a (minor...I'll admit..very minor) downside to our new country. I've always known that this night was primarily a North American thing, but it wasn't until this week that I realised the full extent of that. Sure, there are costumed in the shops - about two racks of them. There is even bags of candy to be had for doling out to the munchkins that come a knockin'. But you know what? It just doesn't seem to be done.


While I respect the cultural differences, the alternative celebrations that happen, and even the missing "holidays" does make me sad to think that it could be years before we have a "real" Halloween again. (It should probably also be a long time before I put anything in "" again, yes?)

I should probably mention though, that while we are tad despondent about the loss of our candy coated eve of fun, we are still enjoying ourselves. We never really kept the candy anyway. We told the kids that there was a Halloween Fairy who could only stay healthy by eating tons of sweets. So, the kids would trade all but a few pieces of their stash for a gift from the fairy. It gave them something they'd wanted for awhile, and gave Hotty Hubby enough chocolate to keep him busy for a year a week.

Tonight there were fireworks. The gathering and fun began at 6 p.m. as a sort of fundraiser for one of the local schools. Another disappointment for the spawnlets when I informed them I had work, thus doing away with any hope of a trip down there.

Fear not dear kiddies, mummy is awesome (like there was any doubt?!). One of the greatest things about this town is that it is relatively flat. Because of this, I was pretty sure we could see the fireworks from our house. By the time they started the kids had been in bed for over an's Spring here and getting darker we woke them up, wrapped them in a blanket and perched them on top of our car in the driveway to watch the lights.

It was peaceful, it was fun, they enjoyed themselves and it was free. No money spent on candy, no costumes that they wear once and then we donate to the thrift store, no one knocking on my door til all hours.

The only thing that marred the fantasticness (it's a word dammit. Stupid spell checker) was the asshole down the road. Our neighbours two houses over also had the idea of coming out into the driveway to watch the fireworks, and had a friend with them.

Asshat (definition: someone with their head so far up their own ass, they are wearing it as a hat) was so drunk that he was doing his best to .... well I'm not sure what he was trying to do. Every time the kids oohed or aahed over the fireworks, he'd say "It's not THAT great". Every time they laughed, he'd tell them "It's not that funny" or "Are you laughing at ME?!".

The last time he said "Geez, it's not that exciting" I'd had about enough. I had a whole slew of profanities I was willing to throw at him, but I'm told that in the company of people under a certain age, this isn't necessarily appropriate. Instead I had to resort to "It's exciting when you're FIVE". I wish I could say that shut him up, but it didn't. However, I'm pleased to report that the kids started coming up with their own retorts.

Ahhhhhhh....I'm raising them well.

Happy Halloween to you all. Now, send me some candy!!

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  1. Lots of things are exciting when you are five! But maybe less so when you are an asshat drunk...
    I'll eat some chocolate for you, my friend. I'll sacrifice.
    Fireworks sound like lots of fun, though. Lil m and I went to see pumpkins lit up at a local farmer's market...hundreds of them. It was cool, even though it was raining!

  2. Sounds like that guy wasn't quite drunk enough.

    Glad you made the most of it!

  3. I would certainly be giving the neighbor who invited the asshat over a piece of my fucking mind today, well out of earshot of tender sensibilities.

    Maybe next year you could have a Halloween party for the kiddies?

  4. Well you had to trade that gorgeous scenery for something, right? If you send me a plane ticket to NZ, I will bring all the Halloween candy I can fit into my suitcase.

    Glad the kids enjoyed themselves in spite of asshat!!

  5. It was rainy and very cold and windy here last night while the kids were out trick or treating, so I have a bag and a half of Butterfingers left that someone should really rid me of before I end up loving them a wee bit too much.

  6. What a killjoy. Stupers (short for remarkably stupid persons as you well know) love making others miserable. Especially when drunk! Good for your kids!
    We did the same thing this past 4th of July; sat in front of our home with blankets and watched the fireworks...idiot free, fortunately for all involved.

  7. Aww, that's so sad that you guys don't get Halloween. The upside is that you won't gain 10lbs from sitting on the couch blogging while you stuff your face with leftover Halloween candy. Guess what I'm doing right this second.


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